


The Gravity of You

by botherd



Category: Skins
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-01-01
Updated: 2010-01-01
Packaged: 2017-10-11 15:38:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/113966
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/botherd/pseuds/botherd
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><em>Effy's spent the last few months watching from afar as Katie scraped together her self-esteem, but it's a brittle armour, easy to punch through should Effy wish.</em></p>
            </blockquote>





	The Gravity of You

**Author's Note:**

> Written for [](http://chekhovsrifle.livejournal.com/profile)[**chekhovsrifle**](http://chekhovsrifle.livejournal.com/) as part of [](http://community.livejournal.com/skins_holiday/profile)[**skins_holiday**](http://community.livejournal.com/skins_holiday/). (I feel kind of weird posting Christmas fic a week late, but whatever, it's still officially Christmas until Epiphany, right?)

Effy watches as the clock ticks over to midnight and onwards. She feels nothing.

"Happy Christmas," Tony says, glancing over from where he's standing by the stove, but not for too long; there's mulled wine in the pan and he's watching it like a hawk to ensure it doesn't start to boil.

"Whatever." Effy shakes a cigarette out of her packet. She's nearly out, and obviously the shops will be closed all day. She'll have to nick some of her mum's, or hope Tony takes pity on her.

"It's not that bad," Tony says, placing a mug of mulled wine in front of her and sitting down opposite. She says nothing; he might have bothered to show this year, but she hasn't quite forgiven him for not turning up last Christmas. It's been difficult to feel festive anyway, and if it weren't for Tony coming home and her dad being a twat and inviting himself over for Christmas dinner in a misguided attempt to put their family back together, Effy would have probably ignored the day altogether.

As they drink their wine she listens to Tony's tales of university shenanigans, but refuses to be drawn when he asks how her year's been. He fills her silences as they finish off the wine, and then sometime around one, Effy's phone beeps with a new text. She must look surprised when she sees the name that flashes up, because he sounds curious when he asks her who it is.

"It's Katie." A year ago Effy got ten texts a day from Katie, most of which went unanswered, but it's been months and months since she heard from her last.

"Katie? Isn't she the girl you twatted with a rock?"

Effy nods, saying nothing, and then she laughs when she reads the message.

_Do u no how 2 break in2 a house?_

_Whose house?_ she texts back, and the answer comes back almost immediately: _Mine_.

This should be good, Effy thinks.

"Stuff to do," she says to Tony, but when he raises an eyebrow she doesn't bother to explain further. At the doorway, she pauses. "Merry Christmas, Tony."

\---

It takes Effy longer than usual to walk to Katie's; the recent snow has turned to ice and the last thing Effy wants to add to her already-guaranteed-to-be-shit Christmas is a broken ankle. She finds Katie shivering on her doorstep, and Katie jumps up when she sees Effy approach, squaring her shoulders. They've barely exchanged anything more than glances in the months since Gobbler's End, so it feels strange for Effy to be here now, at Katie's behest. For a few moments Katie just stares at her, more wary than defiant. Effy's spent the last few months watching from afar as Katie scraped together her self-esteem, but it's a brittle armour, easy to punch through should Effy wish.

(She doesn't.)

"I didn't know who else to ask," Katie says eventually. "I lost my fucking keys and Emily's phone must have died because I can't get through. Stupid bitch needs to learn to charge the fucking thing. And, like, she's off with Naomi, she won't be back for hours."

"And you didn't try ringing the doorbell?" Effy asks.

Katie rolls her eyes. "Yeah, I don't quite fancy getting eviscerated by parents on Christmas morning, thanks. It's not like they know we sneak out."

She must be desperate. Still, Effy keeps prodding. "What about Cook?"

"If I wanted someone to break a window I'd do it myself," Katie says. It's a neat excuse, but Effy suspects her reluctance to call Cook has more to do with the aborted affair they'd had for a couple of weeks in November. (Effy had known it was doomed to fail, and watched it collapse with some satisfaction.)

"Look," Katie says, "do you know how to pick a fucking lock or what? Maybe you hadn't noticed, but it's fucking freezing out here and I need to get inside. If I'm not in the house on Christmas morning my mum'll proper flip out."

"Of course I know how to pick a fucking lock," Effy says, and she reaches forward to pull a grip out of Katie's hair, catching the vague smell of Jagermeister mingling with Katie's perfume as she does so. Katie flinches a little when Effy motions towards her and Effy notices that Katie's holding her breath.

"We should go round the back," Katie says, her breathing becoming more even as Effy steps away. "Don't want the neighbours like, calling the police or anything."

The garden gate is locked as well, but Katie makes Effy give her a boost over, eyeing her suspiciously all the time like she's worried that Effy will drop her. Effy wants to reassure Katie that she can trust her--after all, Effy's here in the middle of the night, helping Katie out--but she knows that Katie's only response would be to roll her eyes, and maybe bring up Gobbler's End. Effy doesn't need to be reminded of that; she's spent months trying and failing to forget. It seems like Katie's been doing that as well, moving through life like nothing happened, only the scar on her forehead telling otherwise.

There's a soft thud as Katie lands on the other side of the gate, then a click as it opens, Katie looking at Effy expectantly. The garden's frosted over, even still snowy in some places, and Effy's impressed that Katie managed to avoid slipping as she landed, especially in those ridiculous shoes.

Effy turns and shuts the gate behind her, and when she turns back Katie's there, encroaching on Effy's personal space and glaring up at her. It's clear she's trying to look imposing, but even though she's in heels and Effy's in flats, Effy still towers over her.

"Just so we're clear," Katie says, "this doesn't mean we're fucking _friends_. You owe me, yeah?"

"Right," Effy says, her voice level. "I suppose we're even now."

Katie looks baffled for a moment, like she can't figure out if Effy's being serious or sarcastic, but she recovers quickly and says, "Just get the door open, you stupid twat."

"Well, I'm not going to help you if you're just going to insult me."

For a second, Katie looks furious. "Did you miss the part where you fucking owe me?" When Effy doesn't reply, unable to resist fucking with Katie for a moment longer, Katie pulls out another hair grip and says, "Fine, whatever. If you can do it it can't be that hard."

It would be fun to watch Katie try, and if Effy didn't have so much residual guilt when it comes to Katie, she _would_; instead, she walks up to the door, gently pushes Katie aside, and says, "Give it here."

Getting the door unlocked takes a few minutes, and as Effy's working she can feel Katie hovering behind her, radiating impatience.

"It takes longer than it does on TV, okay," Effy snaps. Behind her, Katie laughs.

"Whatever, you're obviously just not very good at it," Katie says, just as the lock clicks and Effy turns the handle, pushing the door open and smirking back at Katie in triumph.

"Oh," Katie says. "Cheers."

Effy lingers on the doorstep, standing aside so Katie can enter; she's not sure whether that's all, and she's expected to leave now. "Well, bye," she says after a moment passes and Katie is still silent, but when Effy tries to shut the door, Katie's hand shoots out and holds it open.

"You could come inside for a bit, if you wanted," Katie says with a shrug, like she's granting Effy some huge favour. "You could have like, a mince pie or something. Looks like you could do with one, skinny bitch."

"Okay." Effy doesn't even particularly like mince pies, but she knows it's Katie's awkward way of thanking her and it would be counter-productive to refuse. She hadn't thought there was a way to get past what happened between them, but this looks like a possibility.

When Effy steps inside into the warmth, she finds Katie standing too close to her. There are scant inches between them as Katie says, "Don't fucking like, tell anyone about this, okay? I don't want people thinking I _need_ you or something, because I fucking _don't_."

"Whatever," Effy says, and in an evening of surprises this is the biggest: Katie grabs Effy's head and kisses her, hard. At first, Effy's too taken aback to realise what's happening or _why_, and then it hits her. It's not another misguided thank-you; no, Katie's trying to humiliate her, trying to make this whole situation as embarrassing for Effy as it is for Katie, to ensure her silence. Effy leans back--only slightly, because with the door so close behind her there's not a lot of room to move--and that's enough to make Katie look away, horror and defiance mixed on her face.

"That's fucked up," Effy says, but it's not meant as a reproach; she's hardly in a place to lecture.

"Sort of thing you would do," Katie counters, and Effy looks at her sadly.

"Maybe. I hate what I did to you." When Katie reaches up to her forehead Effy shakes her head and says, "I don't mean the scar."

Katie opens her mouth to say something else but Effy knows better than anyone that sometimes words can be unnecessary. Most of the time, they get in the way. She leans closer and kisses Katie, just softly, and this kiss _is_ an apology, although she has no idea whether Katie takes it as such. At any rate Katie doesn't pull away, and after a moment she starts to kiss back. It's tentative at first; no other parts of themselves touch except their lips. Effy's kissed a lot of people in her lifetime, more than she could possibly count, but somehow this seems altogether different.

Neither of them quite know what to say afterwards, and while it's not exactly like they've reached an understanding, at least Katie's stopped looking so horrified by Effy.

"Did you want a mince pie then?" Katie asks eventually, sounding awkward, and Effy smiles.

"Yeah, okay."

Katie snaps the light on in order to find them, illuminating the kitchen that's decorated so perfectly it looks like it belongs in a magazine. It's a far cry from Effy's home; Tony got the tree up, the same crappy artificial one they've been using for years, but when he tried to drape a few bits of tinsel around the place it looked so pathetic that Effy tore them down again.

"Looks like your family properly gets into Christmas," Effy says. Katie passes her a mince pie and they sit down at the table together.

"Yeah, Mum gets well obsessed."

"Lucky," Effy says, and Katie gives her a sceptical look. "No, I mean it. Mine's guaranteed to be shit. Mum and Dad are trying to make an effort this year, which means it'll be even more of a disaster than usual." She glances up at Katie and says, "Sorry, you don't want me moaning."

"No, I don't mind," Katie says, but Effy doesn't continue. They lapse into silence for a while--not quite as awkward as it ought to be, considering the circumstances--and then Katie says, "Look--thanks for helping me, yeah?"

Effy shrugs. "Wouldn't want you freezing to death outside. Besides, I owed you."

Katie smiles at her; it's the first time in ages that she's directed a smile at Effy, and it's more genuine than any of the ones she used to give.

Effy smiles back, then says, "I'd better go." Mostly she thinks she should probably leave before she manages to fuck this up.

"Okay," Katie says, and she walks Effy to the front door. "I'll see you soon, yeah." It's the sort of thing most people say as a formality, but Katie sounds like she means it. Effy's tempted to kiss her again, just to see what happens, but she doesn't want to push it; it's not exactly like they've managed to fix everything between them, but it's a start, and she doesn't want to upset things.

\---

Christmas Day is as unmitigatedly shit as Effy predicted. She picks at her microwaved turkey and tries to ignore how drunk her mum's getting and how terrible her dad's jokes are, and when the doorbell interrupts their dinner she jumps up to answer it. She doesn't give a fuck who it is; it would be a relief to speak to anyone who's not a Stonem.

When she opens the door and it turns out to be Katie on the other side, she's especially pleased.

"Hi," Katie says. She's wearing a pink hat from out of a cracker; she's probably forgotten that it's even on. "Mum and Emily had a massive argument about Naomi and, like--I thought if your Christmas was as shit as mine, maybe you'd want to do something. I've got spliff," she adds, "and vodka," like she doesn't think her company would be enough to tempt Effy.

"Cool," Effy says, and in the general direction of her family she shouts, "I'm going out." When she gets no reply she just shrugs, grabs her jacket, and leaves.

\---

They end up on a park bench because everywhere's closed, sitting close together for warmth and passing the spliff between them. They don't talk much. A year ago Katie would have chattered away non-stop, but she's changed a lot in the meantime, mostly due to Effy. She's not her old self, but--well, maybe that's not entirely a bad thing. It's fucked up, Effy thinking that anything good came out of nearly killing Katie, but that doesn't mean it's not true.

"Wouldn't have thought we'd have ended up spending Christmas together," Effy says, breaking the silence, and Katie snorts.

"Wouldn't have thought we'd have spent last night snogging either, babe."

Effy's surprised Katie brought it up; she was just trying to get used to the idea that it would never be mentioned again. "Funny how things turn out," she says, taking the spliff from Katie and having one last drag before dropping the end on the ground and crushing it under her heel. She kisses Katie then, tangling her fingers in her hair and pulling her closer until their lips are crushed together and they're both breathless.

Katie's stupid cracker hat starts to slip off and Katie breaks away from Effy, grabbing at the hat and giving it a look of disgust. "Fuck's sake, have I been wearing this the whole time?"

"I thought it was a fashion statement."

"Whatever. In that case, you can wear it," Katie says, placing it on Effy's head. "There. You look banging, babe."

For a moment Effy looks at Katie, her breathing hitching strangely in chest. "Thanks," she says, really meaning it, and when Katie looks bemused she adds, "I mean, for making my Christmas a bit less shit."

"Yeah, well," Katie says, "now you owe me even more."

A smile spreads across Effy's face. She'd been expecting them to snap back to reality, to remember all that's happened between them and realise that it can't be that easily overcome, but now--now, it feels like it might stick.

"All right," she says, still smiling. "I'll have to think of some way to pay you back."


End file.
